I got back to work from the holidays on Monday the 8th, I didn’t know then that it was an important date. Today though, I was stuck in 3 hour meeting and my mind drifted back to something that has been on my mind.
I need to pick a date.
You see everyday when things get stressful at the office or someone says something unexpectedly annoying or provoking, the only thing that keeps me going is knowing that this is only temporarily, that I can do this, that I can hang on a little longer. So I stay calm, I switch back to my aloof setting and I ride the wave.
I need to pick a date
Today though, I needed an extra boost. Some days I read stories of other newcomers, there experiences so far, their struggles, their hopes and I think… soon. Other days, I go on indeed or on linkedin and do a visualization exercise.. me, there, doing that, being that. Other days though, that is not enough and I need to dig deeper, I need a deeper injection of hope.
“2 months to go”
That was a messsage that popped up on my screen from my brother Julius, right in the middle of the meeting. I thought… ‘It can’t be.. there are still at least three months’
Then I realised, this is what I have been telling myself for days, there is still time, and finding excuses to not do the things I need to do to close that gap… it is almost like I am self sabotaging.
I NEED TO PICK A DATE.
That is what it has come to. Pick a date, start a countdown and fit everything else you need to do in that time… So how, do you pick a date, how do you decide on the day that you put an end to what has been 7 really great years if I’m to be honest.
You see, thats the thing, I don’t hate this place, and yes, I make a little noise now and then, but I actually find my job relatively fulfilling. So the only way I leave if by deciding to do it and actively working towards that end.
So.. how do you pick a date?
Option 1. 17/06/18 My birthday in June.. sentimental, I can say, at the start of my 34th year, I started a whole new chapter… but June… that is so far away, by then I could have lost the nerve and opted to stay and die here
Option 2. 01/04/18 That’s April Fool’s, it would be clean at the end of Q3, and at the start of Memorial Month. things would have slowed down at the office. but.. not enough time to handover (what is ‘enough’ time?)
Option 3. 30/04/18 End of Month, that’s plenty of time for the office to find a replacement, but also seems far away.
Option 4. 16/04/18 it would be mid month and I would land on the 17th, Exactly 2 months to my birthday, Two months to have found my footing. and sufficient time to handover if I start mid March. Why wait for mid March.. I am starting my Below the Line handover now. Also… Julius turns 25 on the 19th, 25!! I would like to be there for that.
So there. A date has been selected. 16th April 2018. That is it. I feel elated, my heart is beating in my chest (maybe it is the sugar cookies I just had) but this is really wild. Its happening.THIS IS HAPPENING.